Lyrics

Measure For Measure (November 2012)

Bes At Being Me
Victoria
Danse Macabre
Springsteen
The Tempest (Part Two)
Walt Was Wrong
Mistake
Flesh & Bone
The Unbearable Lightness Of Being Twenty
A Rough Guide To Being Happy
Last Orders (Band Version)
That's What Friends Are For

The Film Noir EP (October 2011)

Danse Macabre
Teetotal (2011 Remaster)
Going Home

Portrait of the Young Man as an Artist (February 2011)

The Lovers & The Losers [feat. Kat Kleve]
She Walks In Beauty
Teetotal
The Tempest (Part One)
Misanthropic Blues (Live Take)
Halfway House To Hell
A Celebration Of Songwriting
The Only Thing Left To Do
The Not-So-Great Gatsby
Last Orders
That's What Friends Are For

THE LOVERS & THE LOSERS [DEMO] (OCTOBER 2010)

Introït
The Lovers & The Losers [feat. Kat Kleve] [DEMO]
She Walks In Beauty [DEMO]
A Failed Song For Tim (Live Take) [DEMO]
Ballad For A Brat [DEMO]
Teetotal [DEMO]
The Not-So-Great Gatsby [DEMO]
The Only Thing Left To Do [DEMO]
A Rough Guide To Being Happy [DEMO]
That's What Friends Are For [DEMO]


Measure For Measure (November 2012)

1] BEST AT BEING ME

Excuse me friend, but I think you forgot
That I know who you are, and I know who you're not
This persona you've adopted all too recently
It just isn't ringing true
Yeah I can't tell who you think you'll impress
With your phony personality and fancy dress
You've abandoned every scrap of your integrity
In a bid to start anew
But hang on, you won't get very far
You've been false for so long you forgot who you are
I accept what I'm not and I'm all that I aspire to be
Yeah I'm best at being me
I always thought that being yourself was a given
Since you only get one life and that's the one that you're living
But I see so many people wearing flimsy disguises
That it leaves me short of breath (jeez)
But even worse are those motherlovers
Who inflate their bloated egos just by picking on others
Those attention-seeking bullies everybody despises
Let them talk themselves to death
'Cause I know that the source of their hate
Is 'cause they feel a strong urge to compensate
For the fact that they're not half as great as they set out to be
Yeah I'm best at being me
So please don't think that I am putting on a show
'Cause what you see is what you get
For better or for worse I am this person and that's all there is to know
But please don't go, 'cause there's still some life in me yet
So I guess that unfortunately
I just can't be the person you'd like me to be
I've gotta work with the things that I'm already stuck with, you see
'Cause that's all I know how to be
Yeah I'm best at being me

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2] VICTORIA

We met in the grounds of an old country house
It was many years back in July
Where the sunshine beat down on the hard English ground
And Victoria smiled at the sky
We played cricket and cards and we propped up the bar
The piano roared into the night
So I sang Billy Joel and I sang from my soul
And Victoria clapped with delight
Though we beat on like boats in the current of Time
There are memories we can't leave behind
All the people and places we never forget
Well Victoria's still on my mind
When the girls met the man then the trouble began
There were clashes of passion and pride
But Victoria's friendships meant more in the end
So Victoria stood to one side
All the journeys and joys that we treasure and share
All the lives that become intertwined
But I'm lost in a dream of nostalgia it seems
And Victoria's still on my mind
How she wished that she'd missed watching them as they kissed
The indignity driving her blind
So she ran down the stairs with her tears in her hair
Leaving lovers and losers behind
So we run from the past as it snaps at our heels
But Time's passage is often unkind
Though it fades over time, well the pain never dies
And it's still on Victoria's mind

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3] DANSE MACABRE

Trapped like an insect in a spider's web
Or a fish upon a hook
You've been absolutely spellbound, boy
Just a wink was all it took
Every movement seems to welcome you
From a flick of her hair to a swish of her skirt
But she's waiting for a chance to stick a knife in your spine
And boy that will do more than hurt
You're trying too hard
You won't get very far boy
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre
Other people shy away from her
Can you guess the reason why?
It's been said that people dance with her
On the night before they die
Boy, you're nothing but a snack for her
She'll swallow ya whole and then spit out ya bones
She'll break your heart and then she'll stop it dead
And it's nobody's fault but your own 'cuz you're trying too hard
You won't get very far boy
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre
You know that you'll never be missed
Just another name on her list
But how can you even resist, oh here we go
So you think you'll be the first to win her heart
Or you think the risk is worth the thrill
If you seek it you'll find it, and more than you bargained for, of that I'm sure
If only you realised that sometimes looks can kill
You won't get very far
You're trying much, much, much too hard
Yes yes you are, yes you're trying too hard
You won't get very far
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre

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4] SPRINGSTEEN

There's a darkness on the edge of town
I can feel it closing in
Oh there's something in the night and it just ain't right
Yeah it stinks of sweat of smoke and sin
These badlands just got worse
And the dream has disappeared
'Cause the promised land we sought was never round here
Mr Springsteen can you hear me?
Can you tell me what I must do?
I don't know any girls called Mary
But I really want to live my life like you
But further on up the road I see a glimmer of light
I'm gonna leave my city of ruins and head for paradise
It's an empty sky and a lonesome day
'Cause you're missing, we're worlds apart
But you're waiting up that road, I know in my heart
Mr Springsteen do you receive me?
Is my message coming through?
'Cause I'm telling ya Bruce, you've gotta believe me
You're the reason that I'm doing what I do
So what if I never was never built to last?
'Cause still I'll stand my ground
Against the storm that's ripping through this town
When night came down it came down fast
It chased me through the backstreets until at last I saw the sun
I saw her face in the sun
And if she's the one
Then for tramps like her, maybe I was born to run

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5] THE TEMPEST (PART TWO)

Lately I've been watching a storm gathering out on the ocean
Wondering if the stress from the thunder is bad for my health
Lately I've been sensing my life's moving in slow motion
Guess I'm trying to tell you that lately I've not been myself
What does a tempest care for pauper or for prince?
It won't discriminate, it makes no difference
We are all the same in the eye of the storm
Like the day that we die and the day we were born
We stand on the brink of insignificance
If you should stumble and fall I don't think I could take it
So stand with your back to the wall or the tempest will break it
Please don't be foolish, you are just a mortal man
You can run, you can hide, but you can't prevent its arrival
There are forces of nature we're unable to fight
Like the fall of the sun and the rise of the night
So take shelter my friend, it's your only chance of survival
Stay close and keep hold of my hand and I think we can make it
Abandon your house on the sand or the tempest will shake it
So I'll burn my books or drown them in the deepest ocean
Burn my books or drown them in the deepest ocean
Burn my books or drown them all and cast my sins away
So open wide and let me in
I will seep under your skin
Once I'm there you won't feel pain
In fact you'll never feel a thing again
The wind and rain will spit in your face but all in vain
You'll be oblivious to it all, to it all
So take my hand, forget what's been
Here's to a cloudless future

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6] WALT WAS WRONG

I was thirteen when I realised that bastard Walt Disney had ruined my life
With false expectations that all situations would end in a sunny day
So fuck you Walt Disney 'cause life just doesn't work that way
It doesn't matter how much you sing
You can plead 'til you drop but it don't mean a thing
And even if your sentiments ring true
You might capture her heart for a minute or two
But it's superficial, she's still not in love with you
If music holds such power then how come all my love songs never work?
Ooo I'm a jerk spewing my guts out to people pretending they care about me
Oh it's sad but true that darling, you're perfectly happy without me
Though it breaks my heart well that's, that's, that's a fact (oh yeah)
Don't shed any tears for me (Shed no tears)
And spare me all your sympathy (Honestly)
I didn't have the balls to let you know (What a stupid motherfucker)
'Cause I'm too fucking weak (Far too weak)
So I sing instead of speak (Just can't speak)
Yeah I'll play my stupid song and watch you go (So I'll watch you go)
'Cause I never thought that I had a chance to blow
But I never asked so how did I ever know?
'Cause ten thousand love songs mean shit
If you simply can't spit out the truth for real
If only I could find the words to tell you face to face how I feel
Because no matter how much I sing it will never make you love me

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7] MISTAKE

Different people, parallel paths never meant to collide
I can show you the light from the dark if you let me inside
We could be equals, so trust me, accept me, embrace me with arms open wide
I have been through hell and high water defending your name
Now I realise that you're even worse than the whisperers claim
Playing with fire, perfidious liar embroiled in a dangerous game
'Cause you're so young and immature
But then what difference does it make?
You'll never change your ways I'm sure
This exercise has been one big mistake
It's hard to spot those who move through the shadows in subtle disguise
But we can tell apart the light from the dark if we open our eyes

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8] FLESH & BONE

If you're leaving me please wait until the morning
Just for one last time pretend that it's alright
You can walk out when the autumn sun is dawning
But please don't leave me in the darkness of the night
Please don't leave me in the darkness of the night
I often feel like life is dealing me the joker
But I sometimes fail to see the funny side
You said we'd both look back and laugh when this was over
But now it's over no-one's laughing, well you lied
Now it's over no-one's laughing, well you lied
I know that this is not the way you planned it out to be
And different people rarely share one individual dream
I held you close and closed my eyes and cried "This isn't happening to me"
This isn't happening to me, this isn't happening to me
Would you listen to the orchestra crescendo
Would you listen to the band play on and on
Let this music be a spiritual memento
For when the flesh and bone of you and I are gone
For when the flesh and bone of you and I are gone
Well we've all been told that nothing lasts forever
And that's a fact of life that isn't lost on me
But if you look back with spite then please remember
This was not the way it always had to be
This was not the way we always had to be
I know that there is warmth and goodness deep inside your heart
But that won't help you when life tears your whole damn soul apart
Your wounds are open now and I can see the things you truly are
The things you truly are, oh yeah, the things you truly are
'Cause baby you're flesh and bone
Baby you're flesh and bone,
Just like me, just like everyone
Baby you're flesh and bone
Baby you're going home
Just like me, just like everyone
I know that flesh and bone is all we really ever are
But my how we have grown, at least we made it through this far
There's nothing half as real as the blood from my fingers
That drips onto my guitar

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9] THE UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF BEING TWENTY

Miranda sits alone, she's done the same for several evenings now
Staring out her bedroom window at the island that a streetlight forms
Amidst the murky rivers of the gloomy path below
Seven billion people in the world and still she's feeling like
The only one whose voice remains unheard
She blames the pain in her no-longer teenage brain
But all the same she can't complain, it feels ungrateful to complain
And so it goes
It's far from perfect
But still she knows
That when the dark and bitter night gives way to tender morning light
She'll smile
Miranda looks into the future for a change for a while
And suddenly she starts to see the scope of opportunity
And soon she realises growing up is not so strange
Twenty years' experience in the world, and yet she's still so young
All her happy memories, and yet so many more to come
She's spent the past few evenings being retrospective
And nostalgia for the past, well it's messed with her perspective
But she knows that there are things she's yet to be
And places that she's yet to see
And people that she's yet to meet
All waiting for their day to come
Miranda's not the only one
Her pessimism is overblown, she smiles and knows that she is not alone

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10] A ROUGH GUIDE TO BEING HAPPY

My songs are laced with irony
They make me sound more serious than I really mean to be
And though it's good to let your feelings out
If truth be told I haven't got much to complain about
The finest friends that I could wish for
They've taught me how to live my life
And now I'll share a little something in return
So friends please follow my advice
You gotta live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
And I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That if you live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other, if we live for our friends
Then everything will work out in the end
Another day has come and gone
So let's all drink too much and then we'll have a singalong
There's no place I'd rather be
And there's no way that I can say how much y'all mean to me
It's all about forgotten evenings, the ones that pass without a care
It's all about the little moments that we spend and when they blend
Into memories we share then I'll be proud to say that "I was there"
'Cause if you love laugh love and be happy, if you live laugh love and be happy
And I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That we live laugh love and be happy, if we live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other, if we live for our friends
Then everything will work out
In the end the good time's got to end, the best things never last
But when your days are dismal then remember good times past
The times we danced, the times we laughed the times that went too fast
And when I start to sing my song
I want the whole damn room to sing along
And not because they know me and they feel it is polite
But 'cause the lyrics mean so much to them they need to get them right
'cause everybody shares one base connection
We're all heading in one ultimate direction
That inevitable darkness which we never shall escape
So sing with me before it's too late
That's why you gotta live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
And I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That if you live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other, if we live for our friends then everything will work out
Well I know I'm no New Jersey boy, but boy I'm having fun
Pretending I'm Bruce Springsteen or Frank Turner's bastard son
So if you're still alive out there if I'm not the only one then sing
Whoa-oh-oh (Whoa-oh-oh) x 3

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11] LAST ORDERS (BAND VERSION)

It's reached that point of the evening again
Where no-one's left around to pretend to listen to my music but you
And I've saved the best 'til last, but you already knew, I can tell
In the distance the bartender's tolling a bell
Saying "Last orders at the bar" for the night
A couple of drunkards stir at the sound
Temporarily roused from their Jazz Age frames of mind
One of them recites some lines from a poem
In a mix of drowsiness and drunken ecstacy
It's doesn't make sense and he's slurring his words
But his friends raise their glasses and nod and agree
Oh it's strange, strange how a man and his words
Touches the people who've heard just what he has to say
And you, listening to me and not them
Old faithful, my only friend, have you come to hear me play?
And it's you, you every time still sitting and listening intently
Though I never hit the high notes, though I always sing the blues
And I see, with one song left that I know from memory
I'm not singing this for me, no I'm singing this for you
So tell the bartender to wait, 'cause I've got one last order to make
Please, sit with me, talk to me please
I'm begging you down on my knees to stay a while
You've stuck with me this far
Oh it's true, all that I'm longing to do
Is to finish this evening with you
Whoever you are
Wherever you are

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12] THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR

I wrote you a tired old cliché and I scrawled it down just the other day
But before the ink had even dried I saw my weary pen hang its nib in shame
Well dear, my clever pen, it knew that tired old clichés just won't do
Not when the subject matter's you – and that's a cliché but true
'cause you, you are the song in the beaks of the birds
And you are the reason I struggle for words
You gave me hope that I had never found before and you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Some guy writes a love song for his girl, he claims "I will love you forever"
But six months later it's over, he hates her, and I think to myself,
"Well that wasn't too clever to claim" 'cause romance may change
But through the fire and the rain, true friends may remain, you and I stay the same
Y tú, cada hora que paso con tígo me parece menos de un segundo
That's a compliment if you're not sure but you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Are you all I've got or all that I'm not, how can mere words express the truth
Still there's one thing left and that thing is you
You are the Sun and you are the Light, and you are the pillow I cling to at night
You gave me your word, how could I ever ask for more? And you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
I wrote you a tired old cliché, that's been said, I wrote 'til my fateful pen was dead
And now that I've cleared my head, well I guess we should call it a day my dear
And when you hear this you might see how much you really mean to me
And if you cry for me with tears I can't ignore, then I'll wipe them away
And you know what I'll say, with a smile I'll say "Hey –
That's what true friends are for"

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The Lovers & The Losers [DEMO] (October 2010)

1) INTROÏT
 

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2) THE LOVERS & THE LOSERS [feat. Kat Kleve] [DEMO]

Madeleine, you're looking fine, oh how I wish that you were mine
And other such pathetic lines created by my lovesick mind
She doesn't love you back you chiromaniac, so do the right thing Jack and give it up
Oh Christopher I'm missing ya, oh how I wish that I was yours
Why can't you see a girl like me is better than those other whores
He says he thinks you're fake, a spiteful little snake
So please for Heaven's sake find somebody new
I love her even so / I love him even so
I'll never let her go / I'll never let him go
Oh what's a lovesick teenage boy to do / Oh what's a lovesick teenage girl to do
Well it happens every day, boy and girl, young and old alike
Some succeed while others lose
I think that love songs are twee, I'd rather sing the blues
The world can see your misery
So dry your eyes now darling, you have my deepest sympathy
It's true what others say though it may not feel that way
But I can guarantee that there will always be plenty more fish in the sea
He's stringing me along I see, oh how I'd like to string him up
I swear she can't be good for me, so why don't I just give her up?
I don't mean to complain (So you're not gonna thank her?)
But I'm sick of all the pain (Well noone cares you wanker)
There's nothing left to gain but more of the same
We're going nowhere fast, this isn't going to last, I simply can't be arsed
It happens every day anyway no matter what you're like Some succeed, others lose / Some succeed, others lose I don't care
I think that love songs are twee / This won't go
I'd rather be with you / Anywhere 
 

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 3) SHE WALKS IN BEAUTY [DEMO]

She walks in beauty, tender as the night of cloudless starry skies
And all the aspects best of dark and bright are met inside her eyes
And therefore mellowed to that tender light which Heav'n to day denies
And though she's dressed in black and mourns a loved one gone
Her beauty's still a sight to see, her presence fills the room with ethereal song
She's hypnotising me
One shade the more, or yet one ray the less had half inspired the grace
Which waves in every gentle raven tress or softly lights her face
Where purest thoughts senerely sweet express how dear their resting place
And though her heart is wrenched with devastating pain
She smiles with quiet dignity, and though my conscious sense I struggle to retain
She's mesmerising me
And on that flawless cheek and o'er that brow so calm, yet eloquent
The poignant smiles that win the tints that glow but tell of good times spent
A mind and heart at peace with all below whose love is innocent
And though I try to clear my mind, try as I might this girl in black is all I see
And I accept that I shall not forget this night, this wondrous night in which she
This magical night in which she, she walks in beauty
 

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4) A FAILED SONG FOR TIM (Live Take) [DEMO]

While I was penning melodies my good friend Tim came up to me
"Stop writing all these songs for girls," he said
"Your lovesick whining's getting tiring, please write something more inspiring
And sing a song of fantasy instead!"
"But the only themes that interest me are love and girls unfortunately
So I don't think I have the drive to write a different song for you..."
He said "I'll wager you a fiver," I said "Tim, well snakes alive,
A fiver could revive that drive – now what is it you'd have me do?"
We shook on it, he beamed as he recounted some strange tale to me
I couldn't make it stranger if I tried
About some legendary treasure trail in which the hunters did prevail
By following an eagle as their guide
It didn't make much sense to me but we had made a bet you see
So what is coming up will have to do
I want to win that fiver so I hope that Tim, it's good enough for you
The British they rode south then north 370 in all, y'know
Where in 18 and two sixes they did see that ol' black eagle float
Ignited, heard its metal ascend its nest and then soar omniescent
O'er where bridge and valley met, and onto where the stone did rest
And onto where the stone did rest, Clara Dally's treasure chest,
But darling you bring out the best in me
So give me a reason and I will stay strong, go where life takes you and I'll tag along
Together forever that's where we belong –
Oh crap I've just realised I'm singing a love song again
Well Tim it seems that you were right, I evidently cannot write
A song without a girl in it for you
But damn your eagles, keep your treasure, writing love songs is my pleasure
And maybe this time I'll get lucky too 
 

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5) BALLAD FOR A BRAT [DEMO]

Your mummy mollycoddles you, she spoils you something rotten
That's 'cause you were an accident, you wretched misbegotten little child
You're a bastard but you're clearly in denial
You've never worked for anything, you take it all for granted
Small wonder that the rest of us are feeling disenchanted, oh it's true
Not that many people care that much for you
Seventeen, you think that you're the shit – remove the article that's definite
The rest of us aren't perfect but we all acknowledge that
So maybe you should too you little brat
Your parents spend 12 grand a year to fund your education
You waste their cash on cigarettes then tell them that you hate them, that's a fact
Superficial supercilious little prat
You bullied your poor girlfriend into sex without protection
You said it makes you horny but you couldn't get a damn erection, what a shame
And you've only really got yourself to blame
Pretentious preening egomaniac, there's one thing you deserve, it's called a smack
I hope you realise what a brat you are some day
And I don't have a thing nice left to say 
 

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6) TEETOTAL [DEMO]

 I said I was leaving once I'd finished my round
But next thing I knew we were out on the town
And now it's the morning and my stomach is sick
I've spent all my money and I feel like a prick
I went on a bender and now Jesus I'm feeling unwell
My stomach churns like a blender and my head is going through hell
I know it's unlike me so I'll forgive you if you smile when I say,
"I'm going teetotal for a while"
It seemed like a bad idea but now I've had several beers
So let's play this slighty risqué drinking game
I don't mean to be explicit, but her mouth – well I really didn't miss it
Making out with your friends while drunk is really lame
There's fun and there's foolish and I think last night was the latter
Don't tell me I'm prudish and don't tell me that it doesn't matter
'Cause if I'd been sober, well I would have run a mile
So that's why I'm going teetotal for a while
If you can't drink responsibly it's fair to say you probably
Shouldn't really drink at all, and some of you dicks should take the hint from me
I wish that our society would favour more sobriety but that's not the case at all
So I'll sit here at the bar with my orange juice alone
It's gonna be tricky, but at least God knows that I'm trying
But I could kill for a cocktail, a cold lager or a glass of rosé wine
Southern Comfort, Tia Maria, and every type of Belgian beer
Are normally more my style, and that's exactly why I'm going teetotal
So goodbye, I'm going teetotal for a while 
 

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7) THE NOT-SO-GREAT GATSBY [DEMO]

My dear you see it's clear to me that love is really blind
You live your life so unaware, I follow kissing your behind
Your back is turned, you'll never learn the things I cannot say
I tried my best to spit them out but couldn't find a way
'cause I tried to write you love songs but I didn't get that far
'cause I'm pretty crap at singing and not much better at guitar
So I wrote this little number in the only way I know
By ripping off Bruce Springsteen songs (The River, Thunder Road)
And now it's fair that I should let you know
That I love you and I care for you, you barely know my name
But I feel a strong connection girl, I hope you feel the same
I thought that love would never touch me, now you've left me feeling small
This Gatsby's not so great after all 
 My dear I see unfortunately you didn't like my news
The green light is receding now and all you've left's me with the blues
But nobody can understand just what it is I see
They think that you're a spiteful bitch for pinning stuff on me
Stuff like fucking up a friendship that you claimed was never there
Well I hate to contradict you but that really isn't fair
'cause I did my best to please you girl, yeah heaven knows I tried
But was your kindness all pretence to keep me occupied
Yeah when you smiled were you stone cold inside?
Well I love you, I still care for you but frankly I'm confused
'cause you've been treating me like worse than dirt, I'm feeling quite bemused
But I'll come back if you want me to just don't ask me to crawl
This Gatsby's not so great after all
I fell to the bottom you kicked me while I was down
But I hear from all the others you're the kind of girl that gets around
There's the impression your list of indiscretions goes on and on and on
Your general behaviour it makes me feel sick
Like when you cheated on your best friend by sucking on her boyfriend's lips
As you kissed you didn't give a shit, it goes on and on and on and on and on and on...
Well I loved you and I cared for you but now I see the truth
You're a spoilt adolescent girl who's burning up her youth
Well I think that you're pathetic, yeah I hope that you regret it
But wait I'm not finished yet
Because my dear you see this land is free for me to bitch and moan
And tell the world in no uncertain terms I hope you die alone
You're too proud to be my pride and joy, well please enjoy the fall
This Gatsby's filled with hate and now it's far too late
Well maybe you're not so great after all
 

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 8) THE ONLY THING LEFT TO DO [DEMO]

The leaves fall in Autumn, but there's blossom come Spring
I'm stating the obvious but oh my, how time changes every little thing
We're not getting younger and maybe this life is all that we get
We're searching for Heaven but none of us have found it yet
But I've always been a believer in making the most of what's here
So when you're tossed on life's seas by tempestuous breezes
You cling to the things you hold dear
We all need companionship, we all need a friend
We all want much more than that but most of us fall short in the end
So will you come gambling with me, well I know we'll be taking a risk
But sometimes you've got to face danger just to know you exist
If we don't seize these opportunities then I know I'll never forget it
'cause I don't wanna pass by, I don't wanna ask why
And dear God I don't wanna regret it
'cause I know, I know I'm handful, yeah, I when I sing it's not quite in key
And I know that when you picture perfection, well I guess it looks nothing like me
But take a chance, what's the worst that could happen
Well at worst you'll have made a mistake
But mistakes, they're what we all learn from
And that's a chance that I'm willing to take
So I'll state with ironic conviction yeah, that I believe I've got the whole world to give
If we're all that we've got why not give it a shot
Because the most important thing to do is live
To do is live
To do is live
To do is live
To do is... 
 

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 9) A ROUGH GUIDE TO BEING HAPPY [DEMO]

My songs are laced with irony
They make me sound more serious than I really mean to be
And though it's good to let your feelings out
If truth be told I haven't got much to complain about
The finest friends that I could wish for
They've taught me how to live my life
And now I'll share a little something in return
So friends please follow my advice
You gotta live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That if you live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other, if we live for our friends
Then everything will work out in the end
Another day has come and gone
So let's all drink too much and then we'll have a singalong
There's no place I'd rather be
And there's no way that I can say how much y'all mean to me
It's all about forgotten evenings, the ones that pass without a care
It's all about the little moments that we spend and when they blend
Into memories we share then I'll be proud to say that "I was there"
'cause if you love laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That if you live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other if we live for for our friends
Then everything will work out
In the end the good time's got to end, the best things never last
But when your days are dismal then remember good times past
The times we danced, the times we laughed the times that went too fast
(We taught the instruments to sing)
And when I start to sing my song I want the whole damn room to sing along
And not because they know me and they feel it is polite
But 'cause the lyrics mean so much to them they need to get them right
'cause everybody shares one base connection
We're all heading in one ultimate direction
That inevitable darkness which we never shall escape
So sing with me before it's too late
That's whay you gotta live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
And I know it sounds simplistic and I know it sounds twee
But if you're optimistic then I'm sure you'll agree
That if you live laugh love and be happy, live laugh love and be happy
If we live for each other, if we live for our friends then everything will work out
Well I know I'm no New Jersey boy, but boy I'm having fun
Pretending I'm Bruce Springsteen or Frank Turner's bastard son
So if you're still alive out there if I'm not the only one then sing (THEN SING!)
Whoa-oh-oh (Whoa-oh-oh) x 3
 

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 10) THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR [DEMO]

I wrote you a tired old cliché and I scrawled it down just the other day
But before the ink had even dried I saw my weary pen hang its nib in shame
Well dear, my clever pen, it knew that tired old clichés just won't do
Not when the subject matter's you – and that's a cliché but true
'cause you, you are the song in the beaks of the birds
And you are the reason I struggle for words
You gave me hope that I had never found before and you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Some guy writes a love song for his girl, he claims "I will love you forever"
But six months later it's over, he hates her, and I think to myself,
"Well that wasn't too clever to claim" 'cause romance may change
But through the fire and the rain, true friends may remain, you and I stay the same
Y tú, cada hora que paso con tígo me parece menos de un segundo
That's a compliment if you're not sure but you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Are you all I've got or all that I'm not, how can mere words express the truth
Still there's one thing left and that thing is you
You are the Sun and you are the Light, and you are the pillow I cling to at night
You gave me your word, how could I ever ask for more? And you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
I wrote you a tired old cliché, that's been said, I wrote 'til my fateful pen was dead
And now that I've cleared my head, well I guess we should call it a day my dear
And when you hear this you might see how much you really mean to me
And if you cry for me with tears I can't ignore, then I'll wipe them away
And you know what I'll say, with a smile I'll say "Hey –
That's what true friends are for"

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Portrait of the Young Man as an Artist (February 2011)

1) THE LOVERS & THE LOSERS [feat. Kat Kleve]

Madeleine, you're looking fine, oh how I wish that you were mine
And other such pathetic lines created by my lovesick mind
She doesn't love you back you chiromaniac, so do the right thing Jack and give it up
Oh Christopher I'm missing ya, oh how I wish that I was yours
Why can't you see a girl like me is better than those other whores
He says he thinks you're fake, a spiteful little snake
So please for Heaven's sake find somebody new
I love her even so / I love him even so
I'll never let her go / I'll never let him go
Oh what's a lovesick teenage boy to do / Oh what's a lovesick teenage girl to do
Well it happens every day, boy and girl, young and old alike
Some succeed while others lose
I think that love songs are twee, I'd rather sing the blues
The world can see / La la, never forget you
Your misery / Blah blah, always regret you
So dry your eyes now darling, you have my deepest sympathy / Sing the cliché loud for me
It's true what others say / Oh I know
Though it may not feel that way / It hurts me so
But I can guarantee that there will always be plenty more fish in the sea / Will I find my peace of mind...?
He's stringing me along I see, oh how I'd like to string him up
I swear she can't be good for me, so why don't I just give her up? (Give her up...)
I don't mean to complain (So you're not gonna thank her?)
But I'm sick of all the pain (Well noone cares you wanker)
There's nothing left to gain but more of the same
We're going nowhere fast, this isn't going to last, I simply can't be arsed
It happens every day anyway no matter what you're like / Some succeed, others lose
Some succeed, others lose / I don't care
I think that love songs are twee / This won't go
I'd rather be with you / Anywhere 
 

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2) SHE WALKS IN BEAUTY

She walks in beauty, tender as the night of cloudless starry skies
And all the aspects best of dark and bright are met inside her eyes
And therefore mellowed to that tender light which Heav'n to day denies
And though she's dressed in black and mourns a loved one gone
Her beauty's still a sight to see, her presence fills the room with ethereal song
She's hypnotising me
One shade the more, or yet one ray the less had half impaired the grace
Which waves in every gentle raven tress or softly lights her face
Where purest thoughts serenely sweet express how dear their resting place
And though her heart is wrenched with devastating pain
She smiles with quiet dignity, and though my conscious sense I struggle to retain
She's mesmerising me
And on that flawless cheek and o'er that brow so calm, yet eloquent
The poignant smiles that win the tints that glow but tell of good times spent
A mind and heart at peace with all below whose love is innocent
And though I try to clear my mind, try as I might this girl in black is all I see
And I accept that I shall not forget this night, this wondrous night in which she
This magical night in which she, she walks in beauty 

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3) TEETOTAL

 I said I was leaving once I'd finished my round
But next thing I knew we were out on the town
And now it's the morning and my stomach is sick
I've spent all my money and I feel like a prick
I went on a bender and now Jesus I'm feeling unwell
My stomach churns like a blender and my head is going through hell
I know it's unlike me so I'll forgive you if you smile when I say,
"I'm going teetotal for a while"
It seemed like a bad idea but now I've had several beers
So let's play this slightly risqué drinking game
I don't mean to be explicit, but her mouth – well I really didn't miss it
Making out with your friends while drunk is really lame
There's fun and there's foolish and I think last night was the latter
Don't tell me I'm prudish and don't tell me that it doesn't matter
'Cause if I'd been sober, well I would have run a mile
So that's why I'm going teetotal for a while
If you can't drink responsibly it's fair to say you probably
Shouldn't really drink at all, and some of you dicks should take the hint from me
I wish that our society would favour more sobriety but that's not the case at all
So I'll sit here at the bar with my orange juice alone
It's gonna be tricky, but at least God knows that I'm trying
But I could kill for a cocktail, a cold lager or a glass of rosé wine
Southern Comfort, Tia Maria, and every type of Belgian beer
Are normally more my style, and that's exactly why I'm going teetotal
So goodbye, I'm going teetotal for a while

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4) THE TEMPEST (PART ONE)

Lately I've been watching a storm gathering out on the ocean
Watching as a darkness engulfs the tranquil sky
Lately I've been sensing that wheels of fate are motion
Something's going to happen, no telling when or why 
Is this how it must be
Isolated for eternity
The ocean boils beneath a stormy sky
I look the tempest in the eye
Lately I've been thinking about how we're all getting older
Have I spent my time wisely or thrown it away?
Lately I've been carrying the weight of my world on my shoulders
And in the fading light I can't tell night from day 
Is this how it must be
Isolated for eternity
The ocean boils beneath a stormy sky
I look the tempest in the eye 
So I'll burn my books, or drown them in the deepest ocean / Coulda been, shoulda been, woulda been
Cast my sins away / All the things that I oughta been
 

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5) MISANTHROPIC BLUES

A good man is hard to find these days
We've reached the end of the line I fear
I'm sorry but God isn't listening to you pray
That's why we call this place Hell 'round here
When the flood comes He isn't gonna save ya
It's too late, you should've listened to your Saviour
But now you've gotta pay for your bad behaviour
It's every man for himself
But I won't take responsibility
All your problems ain't got nowt to do with me
I can't speak, I can't hear, I can't see no evil
No evil
No evil
I'm only ever concerned with myself
And I don't give a damn 'bout anybody else
Are you seriously kidding me, telling me that's evil
I'm apathetic, not evil
I'm misanthropic, not evil
So if you think chivalry's still alive
Well you've got another thing coming
And women and children, if you wanna survive
You better put your feet down and hit the ground running
I set fire to the lifeboats
I set fire to the lifeboats
I set fire to the lifeboats
Just to watch them burn
 

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6) HALFWAY HOUSE TO HELL 
 
7) A CELEBRATION OF SONGWRITING

Well I wondered if I was lonesome tonight after Mr Presley enquired
But apart from a cold, well I felt alright, just a little uninspired
So I sat alone feeling sad and down when I heard my heart announce,
"Don't just sit alone and neglect your friends, it's the time with them that counts"
Bring your friends, grab a beer, tell them all to gather here, now the music's in full swing
A piano, a guitar, they define who we are when we teach them how to sing
Well I wondered if I was born to run just like Mr Springsteen too
But my dad asked me where I was going to run and I didn't have a clue
So I searched my map for a place to run when I heard my heart announce,
"It is not the place where you find yourself but the journey there that counts"
Bring your friends, grab a beer, tell them all to gather here, now the music's in full swing
A piano, a guitar, they define who we are when we teach them how to sing
Well I found all my answers were blowin' in the wind just like Mr Dylan foretold
So I wander the land with the songs I sing and the values I uphold
Bring your friends, grab a beer, tell them all to gather here now the music's in full swing
A piano, a guitar, they define who we are when we teach them how to sing
Teach them how to sing
Teach me how to sing...
 

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8) THE ONLY THING LEFT TO DO

The leaves fall in Autumn, but there's blossom come Spring
I'm stating the obvious but oh my, how time changes every little thing
We're not getting younger and maybe this life is all that we get
We're searching for Heaven but none of us have found it yet
But I've always been a believer in making the most of what's here
So when you're tossed on life's seas by tempestuous breezes
You cling to the things you hold dear
We all need companionship, we all need a friend
We all want much more than that but most of us fall short in the end
So will you come gambling with me, well I know we'll be taking a risk
But sometimes you've got to face danger just to know you exist
If we don't seize these opportunities then I know I'll never forget it
'cause I don't wanna pass by, I don't wanna ask why
And dear God I don't wanna regret it
'cause I know, I know I'm a handful, yeah, and I when I sing it's not quite in key
And I know that when you picture perfection, well I guess it looks nothing like me
But take a chance, what's the worst that could happen
Well at worst you'll have made a mistake
But mistakes, they're what we all learn from
And that's a chance that I'm willing to take
So I'll state with ironic conviction yeah, that I believe I've got the whole world to give
If we're all that we've got why not give it a shot
Because the most important thing to do is live
To do is live
To do is live
To do is live
To do is... 
 

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9) THE NOT-SO-GREAT GATSBY

My dear you see it's clear to me that love is really blind
You live your life so unaware, I follow kissing your behind
Your back is turned, you'll never learn the things I cannot say
I tried my best to spit them out but couldn't find a way
'cause I tried to write you love songs but I didn't get that far
'cause I'm pretty crap at singing and not much better at guitar
So I wrote this little number in the only way I know
By ripping off Bruce Springsteen songs (The River, Thunder Road)
And now it's fair that I should let you know
That I love you and I care for you, you barely know my name
But I feel a strong connection girl, I hope you feel the same
I thought that love would never touch me, now you've left me feeling small
This Gatsby's not so great after all 
 My dear I see unfortunately you didn't like my news
The green light is receding now and all you've left's me with the blues
But nobody can understand just what it is I see
They think that you're a spiteful bitch for pinning stuff on me
Stuff like fucking up a friendship that you claimed was never there
Well I hate to contradict you but that really isn't fair
'cause I did my best to please you girl, yeah heaven knows I tried
But was your kindness all pretence to keep me occupied
Yeah when you smiled were you stone cold inside?
Well I love you, I still care for you but frankly I'm confused
'cause you've been treating me like worse than dirt, I'm feeling quite bemused
But I'll come back if you want me to just don't ask me to crawl
This Gatsby's not so great after all
I fell to the bottom you kicked me while I was down
But I hear from all the others you're the kind of girl that gets around
There's the impression your list of indiscretions goes on and on and on
Your general behaviour it makes me feel sick
Like when you cheated on your best friend by sucking on her boyfriend's lips
As you kissed you didn't give a shit, it goes on and on and on and on and on and on...
Well I loved you and I cared for you but now I see the truth
You're a spoilt adolescent girl who's burning up her youth
Well I think that you're pathetic, yeah I hope that you regret it
But wait I'm not finished yet
Because my dear you see this land is free for me to bitch and moan
And tell the world in no uncertain terms I hope you die alone
You're too proud to be my pride and joy, well please enjoy the fall
This Gatsby's filled with hate and now it's far too late
Well maybe you're not so great after all 

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10) LAST ORDERS

It's reached that point of the evening again
Where no-one's left around to pretend to listen to my music but you
And I've saved the best 'til last, but you already knew, I can tell
In the distance the bartender's tolling a bell
Saying "Last orders at the bar" for the night
A couple of drunkards stir at the sound
Temporarily roused from their Jazz Age frames of mind
One of them recites some lines from a poem
In a mix of drowsiness and drunken ecstacy
It's doesn't make sense and he's slurring his words
But his friends raise their glasses and nod and agree
Oh it's strange, strange how a man and his words
Touches the people who've heard just what he has to say
And you, listening to me and not them
Old faithful, my only friend, have you come to hear me play?
And it's you, you every time still sitting and listening intently
Though I never hit the high notes, though I always sing the blues
And I see, with one song left that I know from memory
I'm not singing this for me, no I'm singing this for you
So tell the bartender to wait, 'cause I've got one last order to make
Please, sit with me, talk to me please
I'm begging you down on my knees to stay a while
You've stuck with me this far
Oh it's true, all that I'm longing to do
Is to finish this evening with you
Whoever you are
Wherever you are
 

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11) THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR

I wrote you a tired old cliché and I scrawled it down just the other day
But before the ink had even dried I saw my weary pen hang its nib in shame
Well dear, my clever pen, it knew that tired old clichés just won't do
Not when the subject matter's you – and that's a cliché but true
'cause you, you are the song in the beaks of the birds
And you are the reason I struggle for words
You gave me hope that I had never found before and you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Some guy writes a love song for his girl, he claims "I will love you forever"
But six months later it's over, he hates her, and I think to myself,
"Well that wasn't too clever to claim" 'cause romance may change
But through the fire and the rain, true friends may remain, you and I stay the same
Y tú, cada hora que paso con tígo me parece menos de un segundo
That's a compliment if you're not sure but you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
Are you all I've got or all that I'm not, how can mere words express the truth
Still there's one thing left and that thing is you
You are the Sun and you are the Light, and you are the pillow I cling to at night
You gave me your word, how could I ever ask for more? And you say "Hey –
That's what friends are for"
I wrote you a tired old cliché, that's been said, I wrote 'til my fateful pen was dead
And now that I've cleared my head, well I guess we should call it a day my dear
And when you hear this you might see how much you really mean to me
And if you cry for me with tears I can't ignore, then I'll wipe them away
And you know what I'll say, with a smile I'll say "Hey –
That's what true friends are for" 

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The Film Noir EP (October 2011)

1) DANSE MACABRE

Trapped like an insect in a spider's web
Or a fish upon a hook
You've been absolutely spellbound, boy
Just a wink was all it took
Every movement seems to welcome you
From a flick of her hair to a swish of her skirt
But she's waiting for a chance to stick a knife in your spine
And boy that will do more than hurt
You're trying too hard
You won't get very far boy
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre
Other people shy away from her
Can you guess the reason why?
It's been said that people dance with her
On the night before they die
Boy, you're nothing but a snack for her
She'll swallow ya whole and then spit out ya bones
She'll break your heart and then she'll stop it dead
And it's nobody's fault but your own 'cuz you're trying too hard
You won't get very far boy
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre
You know that you'll never be missed
Just another name on her list
But how can you even resist, oh here we go
So you think you'll be the first to win her heart
Or you think the risk is worth the thrill
If you seek it you'll find it, and more than you bargained for, of that I'm sure
If only you realised that sometimes looks can kill
You won't get very far
You're trying much, much, much too hard
Yes yes you are, yes you're trying too hard
You won't get very far
If she asks you to dance you're gonna wind up doing the Danse Macabre

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2) TEETOTAL (2011 REMASTER)

I said I was leaving once I'd finished my round
But next thing I knew we were out on the town
And now it's the morning and my stomach is sick
I've spent all my money and I feel like a prick
I went on a bender and now Jesus I'm feeling unwell
My stomach churns like a blender and my head is going through Hell
I know it's unlike me so I'll forgive you if you smile
When I say I'm going teetotal for a while
It seemed like a bad idea but now I've had several beers
So let's play this slightly risqué drinking game
I don't mean to be explicit
But her mouth, well I really didn't miss it
Making out with your friends while drunk is really lame
There's fun and there's foolish and I think last night was the latter
Don't tell me I'm prudish and don't tell me that it doesn't matter
'Cause if I'd been sober, well I would've run a mile
So that's why I'm going teetotal for a while
If you can't drink responsibly it's fair to say you probably shouldn't really drink at all
And some of you dicks should take the hint from me
I wish that our society would favour more sobriety
But that's not the case at all
So I'll sit here at the bar with my orange juice alone
It's gonna be tricky but at least God knows that I'm trying
But I could kill for a cocktail, a cold lager or a glass of rosé wine
Southern Comfort, Tia Maria, and every type of Belgian beer are normally more my style
And that's exactly why I'm going teetotal
So goodbye, I'm going teetotal for a while

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3) GOING HOME

My dear, you know that you draw out the good in me
And there's not a place in the world that I'd rather be
And that's why it's gonna sound mad, quite mad, when I say
It hurts me but I can't go on living this way
Wind and waves and ocean currents
Try to drag me back to your shore
But I have set my anchor firmly
I'm not going back any more
You played out your purpose of drawing me out of my shell
But that's as far as your purpose extends as far as I can tell
We talk from a distance, you seem pretty perfect to me
But I'm scared to get closer and view you differently
Angel, guardian, dear companion
I wish I didn't have to go
But there's a fact that's driving me crazy
I think we already know
You don't need me like I need you
Time to ditch this fantasy and face up to the fact that it's true
I'm going home
I'm going home
I'm going home
I'm going home
Home….

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Latest Release

Measure For Measure January 2013)


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